Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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