I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
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