You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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