So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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