he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize