come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
how does that bad decision feel?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
