The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
