I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I just threw up on my dentist
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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