Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
