So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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