i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
