Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
