Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
