You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
