Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
