so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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