First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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