first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
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