I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Enjoy the penises
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize