Is it because I queefed?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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