I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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