sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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