fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Randomize
