just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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