i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
