Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
