I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
