ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
