break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
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