So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Randomize
