yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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