sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
