Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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