we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize