chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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