Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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