I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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