i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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