hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
