no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
In America we eat man semen.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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