You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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