I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
