A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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