So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
What a dumb baby whore.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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