This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
