Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
