But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
