so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
