was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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