i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
