You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
